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Louie's Industrial Baked Beans

by David Louis

At this point in my life, unlike most cooks in the kitchen, I do not cook for enjoyment. Oh sure, On rare occasions I get to re-visit the days where I'd impress my wife & friends with something spectacular but for the most part I'm just sloppin' out there. I try to feed the family nutritious food masked as something sinful. Which brings me to baked beans. My Mom called it "Twice Baked Beans" when I was growing up and they were delicious. Of course I had to alter things a bit because I'm a rotten son. Let's get started.

2 Large cans Bush's vegetarian baked beans

3 cans dark red kidney beans

1 can black beans

4 slices bacon cooked well, drained and crumbled (optional) if omitting, add a little salt

2 Tbs Molasses

1 Tbs red wine vinegar

1/2 Tbs dry mustard

1/4 to 1/2 cup ketchup

Fist-full of brown sugar (3/4 cup)

Mix all ingredients in a Crock Pot & cook on High for a few hours then warm. If using the oven, cook in Dutch Oven and bake at 300 for 2 hours, stirring often. Taste as you go so you can make it sweeter with more brown sugar, or thicken it up with more molasses, or add some crushed red peppers & hot sauce to test your manhood. You don't want it to be too thick while it's cooking because it will thicken as it cools. Much like hot molten lava and just as dangerous.

Serve with a side of Gas -X