This is making the rounds on email chains and I found it funny enough to post it for all of you to enjoy.
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Pick & Pay.
Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.
Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women – loves to browse & leaves me with endless time to fulfill.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter,
from our local Pick & Pay.
Dear Mrs Lloyd:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store.
We cannot tolerate this type of behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store.
Our complaints against your husband Mrs Lloyd, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3
. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
4
. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
5
. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
6
. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
7
. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room?
And last, but not least:
8
. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'
One of the clerks passed out.
